As you know from my earlier entry, I'm involved in online dating. Involved might sound a little clinical. I'm destroying my fragile ego with online dating. That's probably more accurate. I've gone on a few dates and had very nice conversations with some very nice women. Most importantly I've learned one thing: Women say they want a man with "a sense of humor" but what they mean is "their sense of humor". And that, my friends, is a whole different ballgame.
Let me illustrate with an anecdote from one of my most recent date-sasters. My new potential life partner and I are at an outdoor cafe enjoying the New York summer, when a woman sits down next to us with a "comfort dog"; one of those little canines you keep in your purse presumably because women don't carry enough in them. My date compliments the woman on owning such a lovely animal and then turns to me and asks: "Do you like dogs?" To which I reply: "I don't know if I'm that hungry." To which she responded with a blank stare before the corners of her mouth turned down into what can only be described as a date-ending scowl.
You see, what I did wrong there was not accurately assessing my date's ability to view eating a dog as humorous and paid the price for it, not to mention the lunch tab, which came out to roughly $50. However, it did teach me a valuable lesson: Don't EVER make a joke on a date unless you know if your date is the type of person who watches Arrested Development or Three and a Half Men.